Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Precocious Succubi: The Psycho Ex-Wife Problem

I will be developing my thoughts at more length soon on the subject of gender bias and borderline personality disorder for a guest post on Randi Kreger's Stop Walking on Eggshells blog on Psychology Today Online, so let me just note for the moment that the blog I discovered this afternoon on a (maybe) borderline ex-wife is sort of sickening.  As the daughter of divorce (three marriages for both my parents), I know ex-wives can seem, be, act, and/or go crazy.  However, the vitriol being directed at this person or the population she supposedly represents makes me somewhere between uneasy and queasy.  There is something truly crude about comments like the following:

"All Psycho Ex-Wives Are Precocious Succubi Sent From The Depths Of Hell To Gnaw On The Souls Of Men!"

Or this:

"My godson just divorced the 'tart without a heart' last week."

Tart? Succubus? Grr.  Frustration makes sense.  Packaging it in age-old anti-female chestnuts, well, that could surely be avoided.  People can be scary and invasive when they are losing a relationship or attachment figure.  I get that.  I just don't think being mean (or perpetuating stigma/stereotype/misogyny) is the best response to the problem.

There are 173 responses to the post on the main page of The Psycho Ex-Wife Blog.

So much ranting.  So little insight.

If you are curious for more details, or are just generally drawn to blogospheric trainwrecks, click on the title of this post to be redirected to the artless undignified spectacular display of sexist psychobabble passing for a blog.

Or you could just go watch Fatal Attraction again, followed by its lesser known predecessor, Play Misty for Me.

Splatter flicks with a vengeance against my so-called personality disorder.

And yes, ranting is contagious :-)

And no, I don't always sound this psycho ;-)

1 comment:

  1. I'm a member of Randi Kreger's support site for non-BPs (children, spouses, co-workers, family members, etc.) and although this site has been and remains extremely helpful and supportive, I'm sometimes taken aback by people's use of misogyny, ageism, and other harmful stereotypes when speaking (venting) about the borderline in their lives. I think it's helpful to remember that 1. these people are angry and hurting and 2. folks have been socialized to accept and condone the misogyny and other -isms, particularly when looking at mental illness. The stigmatizing has to stop in order for treatment to become more successful.

    I try to carefully and non-confrontationally point out what I'm seeing when these things happens, which is what you're doing here, and I appreciate that.

    Excellent blog, Lisa. I'm so glad to see you doing this.